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In the beginning, there was Lime. The snail people didn’t know where Lime came from and where they went but, before they vanished, they chose the Shellmounts as the best species. They received evidence that they were the chosen ones.
“Although there are many species in this world, you are the only ones who can perfectly pronounce the word ‘Lime.’ I’ll allow only you to use the holy name. Ah! This is your power. You should regard ‘Lime’ as proof that you have been chosen. For the rest of your life, always recite ‘Lime’ no matter what you do—eat, poop, put on or take off your clothes, in your sleep, or as soon as you wake up, in order to prove my existence…”
“What kind of crap is this?” I asked.
The Inquisitor beamed. “This is the scripture I made!”
“Scripture?”
“Yes! The vocal cords of Shellmounts are very unique. Among the seven species, only they can pronounce ‘Lime!’ Therefore, this is the name I chose for their god.”
The Inquisitor nimbly landed on solid ground, with my colleagues and I following closely behind. His smile was glued to his face as he told us the history of the snail civilization.
“Neither Skians...
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