Chapter 102: Annoying, everything is annoying! (3)

‘How does this bastard know about that novel?’

< The Slutty Secretary > was the terrible novel Ju-Heon had written while talking about gathering fans or what not!

It had excellent writing but was terribly boring, the parts a person would want from an erotic novel never came out, and the suspense was shit……

‘Wait, that’s not important right now.’

Ju-Heon's novel was thrown away.

So how could this artifact bastard know about a novel that never made it out into the world?

‘What the hell has happened without our knowledge?’

Ju-Heon looked serious as he asked a question.

“Number 1. Did you do something behind my back? Did you spread the manuscript to the artifacts?”
“……Does that even make any sense?!”

‘Wait, can artifacts even read novels?’

Nero's artifact just laughed at the two confused humans.

[Nice to meet you like this. Seo Ju-Heon, the rising comet of the artifact world!]

The lights of the amphitheatre that had been off and setting the gloomy mood suddenly started to light up.

Tang tang!

They could clearly see the dome-shaped golden amphitheatre in front of them.

“The lights……!”

The pillars supporting the amphitheatre were extremely fancy and the decorations all around them looked as if taking even one of them would make them extremely wealthy.

This amphitheatre was part of Domus Aurea (Golden House).

This radiant building was lighting up once again thanks to the artifact’s abilities.

But there was more.

[Seo Ju-Heon! I will give you special treatment and allow you to meet with this Emperor!]

The laughing bastard revealed himself as if he was happy to see Ju-Heon.

It was shocking as artifacts usually did not reveal themselves in a tomb.

But the more shocking fact was that the bastard that appeared in front of them was not in the shape of an object.

“Uhh, uhhhhh?”

What appeared in front of them was a man dressed in Roman clothing, yes, it was an artifact in the shape of a human.

Did that have an influence? Yoo Jaeha who never expected there to be an artifact that took human form shouted in shock.

"Wait a minute, there are human-shaped artifacts?!”

There was a simple reason Yoo Jaeha was shocked.

If there are human-shaped artifacts, then there could be a total babe……

‘There might be artifacts that look like women!’

And if Ju-Heon got one of those artifacts, he would naturally have to restore them……

He would need to touch their bodies to restore them…….which meant that……

‘That would be legal skinship!’

The corners of Yoo Jaeha’s lips were slowly twitching but Ju-Heon not only destroyed his subordinate’s dreams, he crushed it into pieces.

“Stop your wild imagination. There are no human-shaped artifacts.”

Yoo Jaeha became extremely angry.
"Damn it, then what about this bastard whose body doesn't match his face?! His face is a Dicaprio but his body is that of a fat pig!”

‘What else would it be?’

“That’s an artifact transforming itself.”

Anubis was an Ankh but moved around in the shape of a dog. It was a similar concept.

“High-grade artifacts at S-Grade or higher can transform to communicate with humans.”

It would be hard to move around as an object. Of course, they still could only transform into things that were related to their identity.

Anyway, the Emperor who showed himself was being covered in radiant lights as he complimented Ju-Heon.

[Seo Ju-Heon, you are very famous in the artifact world! < The Slutty Secretary > that appeared like a comet has taken over the artifact world. Everybody is in love with that amazing piece of work! Everybody is going wild wondering when the next one will be out!]

“……”

[Even this Emperor can’t forget how moved I was after reading your novel! It was completely different from the lowly works created by the other human bastards!]

‘What the hell is he saying?’ Yoo Jaeha's expression was quite entertaining to look at right now.

He had read that novel as well but……

“Which part was it that moved you?”

The bastard gasped at Yoo Jaeha's question before getting angry.

[Are you saying you weren’t moved at all while reading that masterpiece?! Your eyes must be rotten!]

“N, no wait, I'm just asking which part I need to read in order to……”

[Superb writing skills, amazing descriptions! Careful choice of words! Subject matter that provides deep wisdom! Most importantly, this erot……no, complete satisfaction from feeling like he was able to read the minds of artifacts! Anyway, The Slutty Secretary was the best! It is unbelievable that a lowly human was able to write such a masterpiece!]

“……”

[But to be unable to realize its value, your eyes are worse than those of animals! Do you know how quickly the number of obsessed fans of Seo Ju-Heon are growing right now?!]

Yoo Jaeha started to clap.
“Congratulations. He’s a crazed fan. Looks like you’ll be deified soon enough, sir.”
“……Shut up.”

‘I don’t want to be fanboyed by a damn artifact.’

Honestly speaking, the fact that artifacts thought highly of a human was amazing, but Ju-Heon clicked his tongue.

Ju-Heon just felt as if ghosts or aliens were worshiping him.

The only thing he was certain about was that somehow, the novel that he wrote had permeated through the artifact world.

Humans cannot interfere in the matters of the artifact world, so it must have been an artifact that spread his novel.

But which one was it?

Of the fifty artifacts in his possession, the ones who would do something like that were……

Anubis?

‘No, is it this bastard’s doing?’

Ju-Heon was looking at the rope around his wrist. The rope that was in the shape of a bracelet right now seemed to be happy to have Ju-Heon looking at it as it squirmed with joy.

‘I don’t know for sure, but I’ll need to look into it once I get out of here.’

He had been shocked for a moment, but this was actually a big chance.

Why?

‘It’s a great win that the annoying fires are gone.’

Ju-Heon quickly looked around.

He could see the glasses, Homer’s artifact that Nero had thrown earlier, about 100 meters away.

‘Get that first!’

But there was no way Nero would let Ju-Heon do as he pleased.

But at that moment…
“I found it! It’s the artifact!”
“!”

The other excavation teams who had been delayed because of Ju-Heon arrived at the amphitheatre.

It must have become easier once Nero got rid of his fires.

“Artifact, hurry up and become ours!”
“We made it here so give us the test!”

It was normal to clear the tomb's trial to get the artifact and leave.

However, the fat mister shouted with an annoyed expression as if these were unwanted guests.

[I have no interest in junk like you guys! Get lost!]

A terrible fire violently burst out as soon as he said that.

[This Emperor is only interested in Seo Ju-Heon! Get lost!]

“Ahhhhh! It’s hot!”
"Save me!”

Nero then turned toward Ju-Heon with an anticipating gaze.

[Now then, Seo Ju-Heon. You and this Emperor will now……huh?]

But Ju-Heon welcomed Nero with an unexpected appearance.

Ju-Heon had quickly put on Homer’s Glasses while Nero was dealing with these thorns in his eyes.

‘You are mine as long as I put in the time.’

Homer’s artifact was something that could make someone else the main character of an epic poem and impact the target’s life as an omnipotent writer.

‘It normally doesn’t work on artifacts but it will work on this Homer fanboy.’

But he wasn't done just yet.
[Teenage Shakespeare’s pen (S-Grade: Legendary Hero-Grade - Consumable Artifact)]

He also had Shakespeare’s pen that had evolved thanks to the Avesta. There was no way he wouldn’t be able to make this bastard submit with these two artifacts!

But Nero looked disappointed after seeing Ju-Heon's appearance.

[Seo Ju-Heon, you are a talented and famous writer. You are able to write masterpieces without borrowing the power of such artifacts.]

He then said something that shocked Ju-Heon.

[Why don't you just have a literary battle with me?! Let’s battle to see who is more popular.]

‘What? A literary battle? Is that thing crazy?’

But the snickering Yoo Jaeha was truly wowed.

“Wow, jackpot. Have you become the representative for humanity? Can I look forward to your victory?”

But Ju-Heon didn’t even listen to such useless words.

Why?

“Are you crazy? Who would go along with a damn artifact's request?”

‘Especially in a place like this? What would I get in return for doing that?’ But Nero seemed upset after hearing Ju-Heon’s comment.

[This Emperor is personally challenging you! Hurry up and be happy!]

“Shut up. I'm not happy at all. Who the hell would listen to an artifact?”

‘I have time anyway. I just need to slowly make it submit and then get out.’

It was at that moment.

[The aura of a strong artifact of strategy is getting closer.]
[It is a strong artifact that can detect the weaknesses of tombs and artifacts.]

“!”

It was a message that someone was coming to bother him. However, that message made Ju-Heon frown unlike normal.

He was certain. The artifact the message was warning him about was an artifact Ju-Heon knew very well.

Zhuge Kongming Julian.

‘Of all people!’

He was clear about how skilled his former tomb raiding team member was, as well as how much of a headache he could be.
He was worlds apart from those other dumb excavation teams. He was pretty much like a hacker since he could see through all artifact and artifact users’ abilities and weaknesses.

‘Tsk, I thought they said he withdrew.’

He seemed to have changed his mind after hearing that the entrance was breached and came back. Thanks to that, Ju-Heon was starting to feel rushed.

‘It’ll get complicated if that bastard comes here right now.’

Julian would be able to quickly figure out his and Nero's weaknesses and might end up stealing the artifact first.
[The analysis-type artifact is slowly getting closer.]

‘Damn it.’

Julian's footsteps were getting closer.

Based on the noise, 100m, 80m……

‘Damn it, I haven’t made this thing submit yet.’

What could he do? Send the rope to get in Julian’s way?

He didn’t have much time. But Nero, who had no idea about Ju-Heon's current mindset, nonchalantly shouted.

[Seo Ju-Heon! Compete with this Emperor! Hurry up!]

Ju-Heon started to laugh as if he figured something out.

‘Ah, I'm an idiot.’

There was a way to take this artifact with him without making him submit.

This was Ju-Heon's answer.

“Alright. Fine, I’ll battle you like you want. I’ll play with you.”

[Oh, really?]

“However!”

Ju-Heon put a condition.

“Only if you come with me.”

Nero instantly started to frown.

[What did you say? That is not possible. Did you think this Emperor would not notice that this is your plot to drag me out of here?]

Ju-Heon just shamelessly responded as if he had no fear at all.

“Really? Then, do whatever you want. Kill me with your fancy fire if you don’t like it.”
“Captain-nim!”

But Ju-Heon just started to smirk with the spirit of a gambler who was going all-in on a terrible hand.

‘This bastard got rid of the fire on his own accord. He won’t kill me that easily.’

Of course, he would have to deal with the annoying situation of fighting against Julian for the artifact if this didn’t work.
Ju-Heon shamelessly continued to speak as if he was a scammer selling some miracle drug.

“Think hard about it. I am unable to display my true abilities here. A talented artist like you should know the importance of the environment.”

Ju-Heon then nervously looked at Nero, although it was not visible on his face. Nero was just glaring at Ju-Heon without any changes to its expression.

Ju-Heon clicked his tongue as he watched.

‘Tsk, I guess it won’t work.’

Nero's body flashed at that moment.

The human body disappeared and a laurel wreath-shaped artifact appeared!

[Understood. Make sure to keep your promise!]

Maybe it was seduced by Ju-Heon calling it an artist. Either that, or maybe Nero realized it didn't matter since it didn’t submit to Ju-Heon and agreed.

Clang!

The laurel wreath fell to the ground and Ju-Heon shouted with joy internally.

‘Good.’

He heard a familiar voice right behind him at that moment.

“Seo Ju-Heon!”

‘!’

It was Julian as he had expected!

Julian soon saw Nero's artifact.

‘That is!’

Julian urgently stretched his arm out but Ju-Heon grabbed the laurel wreath first.

Tap!

It was extremely close.

Ju-Heon started to laugh while looking at him.

‘Scary bastard, he made it all the way here without any injuries.’

He truly deserved to be one of the Monarch-Grade candidates. Julian started to frown while looking at the laurel wreath in Ju-Heon’ hand.

“You! That!”

Julian approached Ju-Heon looking as if he wanted to take it away, but Ju-Heon agilely dodged him.

“You idiot, the bus has already passed by! Let everyone know that this artifact is already mine!”

Ju-Heon smiled provokingly before quickly activating an artifact.

The two of them almost instantly disappeared.

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miraclerifle's Thoughts

The return of the Slutty Secretary!