star_ocean
2 months ago
·
EditedNot recommended
Read the first 20 chapters. The story has promise but it needs a very good editor.
There are many inconsistencies in the story, some of which could be due to the translation. For example, you can't be a heretic if you were never a believer yet that's what they call people without magic blood vessels and also the reason for genocide. The definition of heretic is one who practices heresy. If you are not of the faith then you are an infidel; from the Latin, fidelis meaning faithful, infidelis or infidel meaning unfaithful or not of the faith.
The MC, being the only survivor of genocide, doesn't seem to have any problems being adopted by the man who killed his entire tribe.
There are flashbacks that tell him how to get a secret treasure, but non that talks about his family, his tribe, or his life before being adopted. It's almost as if that life didn't matter the first time around or the second time after his regression.
A dragon heart is needed for this story to proceed otherwise the MC would not have his chance to be OP. And yet it's also the most poorly conceived part of the story. Why would a dragon hunter tell a dragon where he hid a dragon heart? This dragon hunter was also some grand mage who lived 250 years ago and he built a special library to hide the heart. The grand mage is from adopted mother's side of the family, said to be from the east. Yet this library is on the adopted father's estate. You would think the mage would've built the library on his own family's estate especially since it was the mother's inheritance. So, did they move the library including the basement when she got married?
The plot of the story is interesting, but the writing needs a lot of work. It may get better in future chapters but I'm going to pass on it.
There are many inconsistencies in the story, some of which could be due to the translation. For example, you can't be a heretic if you were never a believer yet that's what they call people without magic blood vessels and also the reason for genocide. The definition of heretic is one who practices heresy. If you are not of the faith then you are an infidel; from the Latin, fidelis meaning faithful, infidelis or infidel meaning unfaithful or not of the faith.
The MC, being the only survivor of genocide, doesn't seem to have any problems being adopted by the man who killed his entire tribe.
There are flashbacks that tell him how to get a secret treasure, but non that talks about his family, his tribe, or his life before being adopted. It's almost as if that life didn't matter the first time around or the second time after his regression.
A dragon heart is needed for this story to proceed otherwise the MC would not have his chance to be OP. And yet it's also the most poorly conceived part of the story. Why would a dragon hunter tell a dragon where he hid a dragon heart? This dragon hunter was also some grand mage who lived 250 years ago and he built a special library to hide the heart. The grand mage is from adopted mother's side of the family, said to be from the east. Yet this library is on the adopted father's estate. You would think the mage would've built the library on his own family's estate especially since it was the mother's inheritance. So, did they move the library including the basement when she got married?
The plot of the story is interesting, but the writing needs a lot of work. It may get better in future chapters but I'm going to pass on it.