Chapter 680: An Auction During a Heavenly Judgment

Silverlight looked up at the patch of sky above the tribulation clouds, concern flashing through her faintly silver eyes.

……

Boom!

A beam of light thirty meters wide exploded out of the ocean at Lu Yun. It was a blast from a crystal cannon! Finally, such weapons were being put to use.

Shot after shot fired, targeting Lu Yun with great power. Silverlight opened her mouth, but shut it again without saying anything. The crystal cannons were his own doing. Being attacked by his own creations… well, he was simply reaping what he’d sown.

Lu Yun turned around to face the incoming light beams. Completely unruffled, he waved a hand and took a few deliberate steps. Formation runes blossomed around him and distorted the air, forming an enormous invisible formation just before the beams of light found their target.

Hum.

The crowd’s jaw dropped when the attacks were easily dissolved with a slight buzz.

Crystal cannons and weapons of war had always been unrivaled and unstoppable in the world. Only an absolutely superior defense or even greater offense could offset their force. Over the past eighty thousand years since those baleful weapons had been invented, no one had ever managed to block them with a formation!

The previous barrage had originated from not only crystal cannons, but also original weapons of war!

“When the ninth prince of Primus Major shot at Dao City in Dusk Province with a crystal cannon, the attack was similarly rebuffed...” someone murmured. “Was it this kind of formation’s doing as well?”

“The perfect tool necessary in every household kit for overcoming tribulations—a lightning rod,” Lu Yun spoke up nonchalantly. “Pre-orders start now! Those interested may put in your orders at the merchant alliance in Dao City.

“Another item hitting shelves today is the Closesky Formation, a formation that can effectively block crystal cannons and weapons of war. Priced at ten trillion crystals each, formation disks can also be found in the merchant alliance of Dao City!”

He didn’t seem affected by the tribulation at all, and looked to be having an unreasonably easy time of things. Members of various factions outside the tribulation clouds were caught off guard. Although many were after Lu Yun, he also had a good number of allies!

The merchant alliance, Lin Clan, East Sea Court, South Sea Court, Unsullied Sea, and Beicang Clan had arrived and flung themselves into the epic struggle without hesitation. They stopped their motions when they heard Lu Yun’s words. Was he overcoming a tribulation or holding an auction?!

How ambitious—or perhaps boneheaded—must he be to pitch his products at this moment?!

A battle to the death had broken out beyond the perimeter of the heavenly judgment. Some wanted Lu Yun dead, others risked their lives to protect him. But the target of everyone’s attention wanted to take advantage of the spotlight to market his treasures and formations?!

“What is this kid thinking?!” Some of the immortals stopped what they were doing as the absurdity of the situation drained them of the will to keep fighting.

“Also… does anyone want the projection of the Dao Flower?” Lu Yun flew up to the projection and poked it experimentally. “If anyone’s interested… the starting price is a hundred trillion crystals. The flower will go to the highest bidder!”

The immortals… the immortals couldn’t even begin to form a coherent thought.

“Ugh, he’s really asking for it!” A Lin immortal glared in disbelief at Lu Yun, his clothes drenched in blood. He wanted nothing more than to rush into the tribulation clouds and beat the brat to within an inch of his life. His clan had already lost three dao immortals to protect this little bastard!

The majority of the immortals present, however, remained silent. They knew that if the clashes continued, many factions would truly get their ire up and become bitter enemies with no chance of reconciliation.

That was the last thing Lu Yun wanted. He’d put on this farce to stop a war from breaking out, even though battle had broken out because of him.

“Ahem!” Clearing his throat, he announced against a backdrop of tribulation lightning bolts, “We all know how frightfully dangerous the trials for a void-realm immortal are. Not only is there a terrible lightning tribulation, there’s an even deadlier tribulation beast at the end!

“Some cultivators endure to the end of the lightning with their last breath, but their heavily wounded selves end up falling to the tribulation beast!

“Today, I’m pleased to announce that this is a concern of the past, thanks to the lightning rod! One rod will enable you to preserve your strength until you face the tribulation beast! You’ll be able to take on that final challenge in peak condition and sweep it away. Just one rod for a tribulation, one measly rod for exponentially increasing your chances of overcoming your tribulation!

“What price do you have to pay for such a treasure? A lifetime’s worth of debt? Servitude for your firstborn? Absolutely not! Each lightning rod costs only ten billion crystals! Get them while they’re hot, they’re more than worth their weight in gold—er, crystals! I guarantee you won’t regret the purchase!

“So what’re you waiting for? Put in your order at Dao City and get yours today! Are your children about to face their tribulations? Are the geniuses of your clan going to take their final test? Fret not, tribulations are no longer the thing of nightmares with a trusty lightning rod!” Spittle flying every which way, Lu Yun delivered his best Earth shopping channel impression.

“The sudden disappearance of Zhao Wushuang’s tribulation in Exalted Major...” someone exclaimed.

“That’s right, it was the lightning rod’s doing!” Lu Yun declared proudly. “A lightning rod can absorb a Diabolical Tribulation of World Refinement and tribulations that are even more powerful!”

“Good, fantastic!” A dao immortal who’d been trying to destroy the lightning rod applauded loudly and turned around, setting a course for Dusk Province. “I’m ordering three lightning rods! This thing can absorb even heavenly judgments… a heavenly tribulation is nothing!”

Three of his grandchildren had sensed their oncoming tribulations. However, they hadn’t built a solid foundation and were thus unlikely to survive their trial. They were doomed to die a dismal death.

The lightning-absorbing rods Lu Yun put on the market today represented fresh hope, so he traveled to Dusk Province without further ado to put in an order!

Those left on the scene exchanged puzzled glances with each other. How had things developed to this point?

The Closesky Formation that could withstand weapons of war and crystal cannons was even more attractive. Although it cost ten trillion crystals, it wasn’t that great a price to pay for the ability to defend against weapons of war and crystal cannons.

Naturally, it was the Dao Flower that attracted the greatest attention. Though the starting bid was a hundred trillion crystals, there was no shortage of wealthy tycoons in the world of immortals who could afford that!

……

“This old servant is retreating, sir. The tribulation beast is coming. You must be careful!” The heavenly judgment’s eyes dimmed and weakened. His part complete, Ge Long returned to the netherworld.

“Tribulation beast?” Eyes bright, Lu Yun declared, “The fourth auction lot, tribulation essence! Everyone knows that the last trial for a void realm cultivator is a tribulation beast. Killing it will yield tribulation essence!

“I’m sure you all know what it can do. It will reinforce one’s foundation, strengthen the constitution, and concentrate immortal energy. Today, I put my own tribulation essence on the block! A trillion crystals for one drop!”

By now, everyone watching had forgotten what words were.

“Grrrrawwwwl!” A beastly roar rang through the sky. Lu Yun’s tribulation beast was about to take center stage.


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etvolare's Thoughts

Alright, did Lu Yun just set a new record? Is sales pitch MC his title to claim across all series?   

I had a lot of fun writing that sales pitch, though I will say I took some liberties and added more color in the price paragraph to make sure the tone came across in English. I didn't put in any sentiments that the author didn't express, just wanted to fit in more lines from a typical TV shopping channel script. Yes, I actually turned on shopping channels to develop that part of the chapter lol.